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Here we are folks…tomorrow it’s will be officially been the one year mark since Agents of GUARD has started.

Kinda crazy to think about. One year since I started writing this weekly column. Thanks again to everyone who keeps reading this column and who keep reading and supporting our site.

I hope you guys stick around and enjoy what we got coming up!

This week is the start of the big summer movie releases. It felt like yesterday that I was writing about Iron Man 3, and this week we got another big Marvel Comics sequel.  Plenty of other interesting movies are coming out, so let’s get this weeks column started!


What’s it about? A rural Quebec man (Thomas Haden Church) contends with the frustration of losing his job and the despair over the death of his wife during a brutal Canadian winter, and receives a mysterious visitor while struggling to escape a prison of his own making. Marc Labrèche co-stars in this snowbound black comedy from co-writer and director Emanuel Hoss-Desmarais.

My thoughts? There’s a twinge of Coen Brothers in this flick, and I dig the vibe and visual style. Thomas Haden Church looks to be in good  use in this film, as his off beat delivery fits the black comedy elements of the movie very well.


What’s it about? Casper (Emory Cohen) and Dominic (Callan McAuliffe) have been fiercely loyal friends since childhood. Desperate for a way out of their quiet town on the Maine-Canada border, the boys make a pact to pool their earnings on a car and hit the road. But when Casper is drawn into drug smuggling with his outlaw father (Aidan Gillen) to pay his share, their friendship is pushed to the brink and adult choices forced on them all too soon.

My thoughts? Game of Thrones fans keep an eagle eye look and see actor Aidan Gillen (who plays Petyr ‘Littlefinger’ Baelish) in this. The trailer showcases a strong visual look, but the story isn’t really grabbing me from the trailer alone. If I hear enough good word about it, I might give it a shot.


What’s it about? A charismatic womanizer receives his comeuppance after his penis mysteriously leaves his body and takes human form.

 My thoughts? Crazy weird idea for a flick, and one that is full of comedic potential. I’m not a fan of Cam Gigandet, as I feel he is a really bland actor and a comedy seems like the worst idea to have him be the lead in. Could be a decent flick to watch on a boring weekend afternoon, but not one I’ll go out of my way for.


What’s it about? Scott and Penny just moved to a remote cabin to escape the pressures of the world and breathe new life into their art. But they’ll soon discover they are not alone: an infamously reclusive artist – known only as “Mr. Jones” – lives nearby. He doesn’t like to be disturbed, and only comes out at night when he drags his strange, sinister sculptures deep into the woods. When Scott and Penny’s curiosity leads them too close for Mr. Jones’ comfort, he plunges the young couple into a nightmare world of mayhem, madness and mind-bending terror.

My thoughts? You all now how I feel about found footage horror films. I’m just numb to them now. This one seems ok. It doesn’t seem terrible. It seems just..ehh.


What’s it about? Jellyfish Eyes tells the story of Masashi, a young boy who moves to a sleepy town in the Japanese countryside with his mother in the wake of a natural disaster. After returning home from his new elementary school one day, Masashi discovers a flying jellyfish-like creature whom he befriends and names Kurage-bo. Masashi soon discovers that all his classmates have similarly magical pets, known as F.R.I.E.N.D.s, which are controlled by electronic devices that the children use to battle one another. Despite their playful appearances, these F.R.I.E.N.D.s turn out to be part of a sinister plot that will threaten the entire town.

My thoughts? WHOAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What did I just watch????????? I guess you can say this is what a live action Pokemon movie might look like. This movie looks crazy, but also pretty damn amazing!  I love the insanity of the creatures and the imagination of this thing. If the trailer is right, and the film even found a way to do some commentary on the life of Japan post the Fukushima disaster, then that only makes this movie more impressive.


What’s it about? After losing an audition for her dream job, an aspiring Los Angeles TV news anchor goes out for an uncharacteristic night of partying. She awakes in a stranger’s bed to a phone message from her agent telling her the job is hers, if she can make it across town by 5 pm. Stranded in an unknown area without money, a phone, and a car, she embarks on a series of misadventures as she races to the most important job interview of her life.

My thoughts? I like Elizabeth Banks. She’s always great in every movie I see her in. She’s got this wicked comedic edge that people seem to keep forgetting that she has. While I’m sure she’s good in this movie,  this is the kind of comedy in which the lead character literally did nothing wrong and life is shitting on them every two seconds. I’m not a fan of those comedies, but if you have no problem with that, then this looks like it could be worth a look.


What’s it about?  Boss Suchart is the influential owner of a major elephant camp. When he was murdered in his own home – the killer delivered three fatal blows on his body – all evidence points to KHAM (Tony Jaa), who was present at the crime scene and was seen with the victim the moment before he died. Kham is forced to run as the police launches a pursuit. Meanwhile, the twin nieces of Boss Suchart (Jija Yanin Wismitanan and Teerada Kittisiriprasert) are out for revenge. But luck is on Kham’s side when he runs into Sergeant MARK (Mum Jokmok), an Interpol agent sent to Thailand on a secret mission.

As Kham is hunted by several parties, he’s also desperately searching for KHON, his elephant, whose disappearance is involved with Boss Suchart’s death. In another twist, Kham is drawn into an underground fighting ring run by LC (RZA), a crime lord who’s obsessed with collecting top-class martial artists from around the world. LC’s fighters are branded only by numbers, such as the lethal, beautiful TWENTY (Ratha Pho-ngam) and the diabolical NO.2 (Marrese Crump). These fighters are ordered to defeat and capture Kham for a special mission that LC has in mind.

My thoughts? I used to get very excited for Tony Jaa. As a martial arts movie fanatic, Tony held  the first true potential of action movie wowness since Jackie Chan in his prime. Tony’s athleticism was a sight to be hold, and the first Ong Bak movie still blows me away with it’s choreography and the strength of Tony Jaas physicality. It was watching his second flick, Tom-Yum-Goong (The Protector here in the states) that made me realize Tony was lacking one very important element to being a movie star…..on screen charisma. He had none. He was a great stunt performer, but Tony has no real knack for expressions or emoting. He can scream, but there was no personality coming through in his movies. Jackie Chan plays the same guy in very Jackie Chan movie, sure, but he’s got an appealing  personality that makes it fun to root for the guy. It isn’t JUST the fighting skills.

Tony has gone through a rough time the last few years (he had a bit of a mental breakdown while directing Ong Back 2 and 3.) Tom-Yum-Goong 2 (aka, The Protector 2) is his big return to form. While I don’t think  Tony is the successor of the martial arts star throne anymore, I would be down to see how this new one is. The stunts still look like fun, and this time he is sharing the fight scenes with Yanin “Jeeja” Vismitananda, who was the star of the martial arts movie Chocolate. I like that, and Yanin actually has some on screen charisma that could be good to balance out the lack of emoting that Tony Jaa will bring.

My worry is director Prachya Pinkaew, who knows how to shoot a fight scene but can’t tell a story to save his life. His movies have great fight scenes, but maddening storytelling, characters, and plot holes that you can drive a Mack truck through. If anything, going to check out The Protector 2 would mean knowing one thing for sure, go see the movie for the stunts and fighting, nothing more.


What’s it about? We’ve always known that Spider-Man’s most important conflict has been within himself: the struggle between the ordinary obligations of Peter Parker and the extraordinary responsibilities of Spider-Man. But in The Amazing Spider-Man 2, Peter Parker finds that his greatest battle is about to begin.

It’s great to be Spider-Man (Andrew Garfield). For Peter Parker, there’s no feeling quite like swinging between skyscrapers, embracing being the hero, and spending time with Gwen (Emma Stone). But being Spider-Man comes at a price: only Spider-Man can protect his fellow New Yorkers from the formidable villains that threaten the city. With the emergence of Electro (Jamie Foxx), Peter must confront a foe far more powerful than he. And as his old friend, Harry Osborn (Dane DeHaan), returns, Peter comes to realize that all of his enemies have one thing in common: Oscorp.

My thoughts?  There are days were I feel like the last defender of the Sam Raimi Spider-Man movies. While the third one has it’s big ass problems, I still love the first two films. Hell, I say Spider-Man 2 is still on my list of top five favorite super hero movies of all time. I love it that much.

I have massive problems with the last film, The Amazing Spider-Man. I felt that the movie’s plot fell apart at the seems (the Lizards plan to turn Manhattan into lizard people was just flat out stupid in my opinion), and that the characters were underdeveloped. And yes, the nagging factor of “why are we doing the origin again?” still bothered me.

I know a lot people were very happy with the last movie, some say they loved it more than the Raimi films, and I’m not gonna lie, that kinda bums me out. The Raimi movies are still great to me! I re-watched the first two recently, and they still hold up very well. There was a period that I could have sworn that most people were on the same page as me, but I guess I was wrong, and the Marc Webb Spider-Man movies are more their cup of tea. To each their own I guess.

The one place that can agree with the Webb movies is the casting.  I keep saying that I’m the last Tobey Maguire defender in the role of Spider-Man/Peter Parker…..but Andrew Garfield is clearly the better man for the role. He’s perfect. He brings the right humor and nerdiness to the part that was just great. He’s even built like a perfect Spider-Man, lanky and slim. His chemistry with Emma Stone was just magnetic, and clearly that was the element that drew people the most in with the last movie.

That being said, I feel hopeful for this new one. I’m glad they put Spider-Man back in his original costume. The last film’s redesign felt like change for change sake. You don’t mess with one of the best (if not, THE best) super hero costume designs of all time. It isn’t just the fact they put in him the original costume…it’s the fact that this is the BEST version of Spider-Man’s costume on the big screen. It’s fantastic! I love the bigger eyes the most. It reminds me of how famed Spider-Man artist Mark Bagley draws him.

I’m curious to see how they are going to balance the amount of villains they have in this movie. Over stuffing your comic book movie with a ton of villains can be the kiss of death to a super hero movie, so here’s hoping they can make it work.

I’m curious to know how the Hans Zimmer score is going to work in this film. Apparently they used a very nontraditional approach to the music and hired a bunch of musicians to collaborate on what could be a unique movie score.

The cast seems up to the task on making this work, and the action that’s in this trailer is pretty damn impressive. It definitely seems like director Marc Webb has learned some lessons and is ready to do some big comic book action.

I want to love this movie, I really really do. I used to love Spider-Man movies, and I don’t want to not like another one. I love the friendly neighborhood wall crawler, he’s my favorite, and I want to get excited for one his movies again. Here’s hoping this film will deliver it’s epic promises.

Ok folks, what do you think about this weeks releases? Let us know in the comments below!

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