With the recent announcement of the TV adaption of From Dusk Till Dawn, we here at GUARD (mostly me, but I’m sure I’m not alone in my rabid vigilance) have been left to quandar the questions quietly quickening our quivering qualms… Is this the start of something much more nefarious?
The answer is no.
…okay, okay, I’ll show some examples! Geez, man, what is your deal?
We’ll begin with the show that got this question all cooking on our noodles in the first place:
From Dusk Till Dawn
You can read up on the previous article about it here, but a quick explanation is that From Dusk Till Dawn is the movie that Quentin Tarantino wrote, and that Robert Rodriguez directed. Well, ol’ Robert is starting up his own channel, El Rey, and needs content to fill it with. So they’re going to make a longer, uncut version of the movie, and cutting it for television. Judging from what’s been shown, it looks pretty slick, but are we as an audience ready to see this story again? Maybe.
After this, we started realizing that turning movies into TV shows isn’t a new thing.
Okay, disclaimer. Full disclosure. I frickin’ love this show. Its absolutely amazing. And we talk about it often on this site, but that’s for a very excellent reason. ITS THAT GOOD. But in some ways, Hannibal is an anomaly. Because it is one of two examples of a successful adaptation to your regularly scheduled programming. There are much more examples of horrible, disappointing, and plain stupid adaptations.
Nate Note: And some could argue that Hannibal is more an adaptation of the books more than an adaptation of the movies. This is true. But I’m arguing for the standard viewer. And the standard viewer… doesn’t read many books. Because guess what Hannibal is playing on? The TV. So one can say the standard Hannibal viewer saw the movies and is wondering in the back of their head why Anthony Hopkins isn’t on the show. Well, DUH! He’s too busy playing Odin, you goof!
So if Hannibal is so good, but its an anomaly, then what was the other success?
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
(Just watch the first two, the rest is up to you!)
For those of you who aren’t as, let’s go with “enthusiastic” instead of “dangerously obsessed,” as me when it comes to all things Joss Whedon, Buffy the Vampire Slayer started out as a movie. Luke Perry was in it. So was Pee Wee Herman. The movie took different… creative directions than Whedon would have liked. And so, with his mighty thews and inexorable brilliantity (its a word, I made it up!) Whedon was able to create a TV show. And thus my fate was sealed.
It may seem I’m mentioning a lot of GOOD examples. That’s because it was easier to get through them. Because there were only two. And now I show you that MISTAKES WERE MADE:
My Big Fat Greek Life
Based on the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding, this thing is about as interesting as you imagine it to be. Actually, if you even remember that this show existed at one point, then you and I are equal in how much of the show we actually watched.
(Skip 10 seconds ahead)
Weird Science was a beloved movie of mine. In the 80’s. In 1985, to be exact. So you can picture my excitement when they made a TV show based on it…. TEN YEARS LATER. In 1994. What? That’s dumb. SO DUMB.
Honey I Shrunk The Kids
(Yeah, its in another language, but you get the idea)
NO. Just no. I’m not interested. I liked the movie. I didn’t like any of the sequels. So don’t make a CONTINUOUS sequel. Argh.
Behold the 90’s catchphrases in all their… “glory.” Again, I liked the movie. That’s enough for- …is that the entire cast? This show was only missing, like, Alicia Silverstone and Paul Rudd? And this is Paul Rudd circa 1996. He did not have anywhere near the same juice in the 90’s that he enjoys now. I’m surprised they couldn’t get him. DONALD FAISON?! Did Scrubs not give you your super powers yet?
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Maybe it was good. Maybe it had potential. Hell, it had Summer Glau, and usually that’s enough. But… I WORSHIP Terminator 2. It was the perfect ending. I’ve despised every sequel since. And a TV show… just… JUST NO. For the fans of this show, sorry if I hurt your feelings, but this show hurt my feelings first by existing.
Okay, I’ve shown the present and the past, time for…. THE FUTUUUURE…!
This is happening, people. And with some BIG acting talent showing up! Billy Bob Thornton, Martin Freeman, Colin Hanks, Bob Odenkirk, Oliver Platt, Glenn Howerton… Even KEY & PEELE! What? I’m just… WHAT? Okay, so I’m pretty impressed. I’ll watch the first episode or two… but I loved the movie. I loved how stand alone it was. Can’t they put this much money and star power toward something completely new? The Coen Brothers are involved, so can’t we get something original from them? Oh well… these were very similar problems I had with Hannibal, and that show shut me up.
And 20 years later, SyFy is making a 12 Monkeys series. Oh SyFy… who touched you? Just talk to an adult already.
Wow that was awful. And am I the only one that felt a kinda unintentional Dexter vibe from it? The whole sawing the cardboard cutout… very creepy and serial killer-esque.
If that had been planned, then I would have loved the show.
And anyways, I liked Parker Lewis Can’t Lose way more. Oh the ’90’s…
Did I miss any shows? Do you think I am the stupid with many stupid ideas and should shut up and go back to stupidland? Let me know!